Thursday, June 28, 2012

Update

I don't even know if anyone keeps up with this blog anymore, but if you do you've probably noticed that my posts have been few and far between lately. I'm not going to say that I don't have time because I could make time if I really had something I needed to say. However, I've been much to busy living my life lately to spend hours online writing about it. I think I spent last year waiting for something to happen that would bring me out of the funk that I had been in since about half way through senior year. I didn't really realize that I would have to be the one to make something happen and move my life onto a more positive path. I didn't realize that, and yet I made the move eventually anyway.

I have never been an extremely social person. All my life, if I needed someone to hang out with or someone to talk to, I always had my gaggle of sisters to turn to. I wanted friends, but I wasn't really sure how to make them. Until recently, the last time I made a friend on my own and not through mutual friends was in 7th grade.  Like I said, I'm not a social person. If you put me in a room with a ton of strangers, I'm not likely to strike up conversation. It takes a lot of effort for me to be that outgoing, but it's something that I've always thought I needed to work. So when I started at Zupas, I was absolutely determined to make some friends there. I just started talking. I tried to get to know everyone. At first, I thought that we would all make one very awesome, large group of friends. As we've all gotten to know each other more, though, we've formed our own groups and pairs.

It's been really interesting to see these groups evolve. My own group started out being fairly large and has narrowed itself down to three people (one of which doesn't work at Zupas.) The first time we got a group of us together after work was super awkward and the most fun I have had in months. We laughed our heads off at absolutely nothing and people who saw us probably thought we had been friends for a very long time instead of being coworkers who had only known each other for two weeks. After that, certain people seemed to get weeded out of the group. The process continued until it ended up just being me, Megan, and Ian. I love when you meet new people and they just absolutely click with you.

Anyway, Megan and Ian are the type of friends that I always wanted in high school (which is slightly ironic, considering Ian and I were friends in high school.) We make plans all the time. We can sit talking to each other until three in the morning. We talk about the tv shows and music we like as well as the bigger, more important things in our lives. I can truly be myself with them in a way that I couldn't be with any of my friends in the past.

And I'm writing all of this because I've been confined to my couch for the past few days. See, I've had a couple of lumps on my left foot for years. I haven't really paid attention to them, but ever since I've been working more the lumps have been getting larger and have been hurting more. My mom has been telling me to get them looked at for such a long time and finally convinced me two weeks ago. I went to the doctor and was referred to a podiatrist. I had my mom come with me because I have been to the doctor exactly two times in the past fifteen years before this month. I was nervous, but Carley came as well and kept me distracted. The podiatrist said that it was most likely two different cysts that they could remove with two small incisions.

I had the surgery on Tuesday. I was ridiculously nervous. I've never even had an iv before, let alone a surgery. It was all a lot simpler than I thought it would be, though. The nurse got the iv in easily, the anesthesiologist brought me back to the OR and then they hooked me up to monitors and got the medicine started. I vaguely remember them putting the anesthetic into my foot. I remember that hurt, but I don't remember the pain. One minute I was listening to the beeping of the monitors and the next moment they were waking me up, telling me I was done. I remember saying "Seriously?" because I couldn't believe it was already over. The doctor told my mom that I was smiling and had everyone laughing when I woke up, though, so something more must have happened.

The doctor also told my mom that it was worse than they thought. Instead of being two cysts, there was only one large cyst that was attached to my tendons. They tried to get to the source, but it is likely that it will come back. Anyway, instead of two small incisions, I have one 3 1/2 inch incision on my foot. I'm not supposed to be walking on it and I am therefore stuck on the couch. A while ago, I would have loved the idea of not having to do anything or go to work or get off of the couch at all. Now, though, it is driving me nuts to just sit here. I want to hang out with my friends and see my work peeps and play cards with my sisters at the kitchen table. So it's driving me nuts to sit here, but that's ok. Soon enough I will be out and about once again. :D