Monday, November 28, 2011

Uncertainties

My life is weird lately. For a while now, I've felt kind of... Off. A lot of is still this whole process of adjusting to being in college. Everything is so different. For the first time ever I'm spending almost all of my time by myself. I go to class and I sit quietly because I don't have friends in any of my classes. I go to work and stay quiet because it is very seldom that I work with the one person that I really talk to there. I come home and it's usually late enough that everyone has gone to bed. I spend a few minutes here or there talking to some person in my class or someone in my family before I go back to doing whatever it is on my own.

The whole thing isn't good or bad. It's just different. All through high school I was pretty much constantly talking to people. I was incredibly social. Then I would come home and spend most evenings with my family. I was only working three days a week at the time, so nobody really knew me well enough to talk to me. I was usually sent home early, anyway.

So I feel a little weird about my life. I spend a lot of time just thinking about things and I have no idea where these thoughts have led me at this point. The balance between work and school and home has shifted so much. I don't really know who my friends are or where I fit in my world anymore. I don't really know what I want with my life, present or future.

I don't really even have the words to explain much more than that...

Two more weeks and then I have three weeks off of school. Maybe I'll be able to figure out where my head is then.

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