There are so many things that have gone through my mind in the last hour or so. And since it has been a while since I've actually blogged something substantial I figured that I would write something today.
About an hour ago I was sitting on my bed, watching TV, and browsing the internet on my laptop and I had a thought. 'I wonder if anyone else has blogged lately'. After following that thought I saw that Mr. T had written a blog a couple of days ago. It made me happy to see it. I love reading other people's blogs. Especially when the blog belongs to someone I haven't spoken to in a while. On top of that Mr. T's blog was on something that I've actually wondered about before. It was great to read it (along with the links to other blog entries that worked with it); it got me really thinking about a lot of things (things that did not necessarily correspond with the topic of the blog).
One of these things came from an assignment that I am starting in one of my classes. The assignment is to research a college you might want to go to. Find the majors that you might consider, look at admission requirements. That kind of thing. I was thinking about it and then I saw Mr. T's blog and it just kind of emphasized what I've already been thinking about what I want to do with the rest of my life. Right now I have two ideas about what I might want to do. These ideas are completely different from what they were a year ago. It was about this time last year that I was beginning to change my mind on what I did and didn't want to do with the rest of my life. A year ago I wanted to be an Aerospace engineer. A big shot smarty pants who would design all kinds of fancy mechanics for NASA and such. It was a big dream of mine since an astronaut came to my elementary school in sixth grade. I realized then that I really wanted to know more about the universe. I wanted to see the universe. However, I am not the kind of person who would be into the whole shooting a rocket up into space and so astronaut was out (this also how I came to rule out firefighter in second grade, I hate heights and that cherry picker thing would scare the crap out of me). The next logical conclusion I came to was to work with the astronauts in some way that would allow me to be close while staying away at the same time.
I have mentioned previously that 2008 was a big year for me. There were a lot of inspirations that came with the events (good and bad) that came with it. One of these was that, while science has always been interesting to me, I can't see it being a career. It might be fun, but I can easily see that fun wearing off eventually. So I started thinking (because of course I need to know my life plan in 9th grade) about what talents and interests I had that I didn't think I could ever get bored with. My conclusion? Writing. Reading. Discussing language and ideas. All of these things led me to several career ideas. First there was writing. I know that the percentage of writers who actually manage to live off of their writing alone is very small and, even if I think I am an decent writer, the chance of me making it would be slim. The next thing that came to me was teaching, English specifically. I thought, "If I could learn to teach and inspire kids half as well as Mr. T did for me then I might find that I would really like it". The third inspiration is actually more recent. Journalism. This year I am on Layton High's newspaper staff. I love it. I love the environment and I love the work. I'm actually going to apply to be an editor next year. I could see myself going far with journalism. I could inform people about world issues all the while informing myself. It is very very appealing to me right now. I love it! That isn't the only thing Mr. T's blog made me think about today, though.
Another thought inspiring thing came along when I came to the part of Mr. T's blog that mentioned his inspiration to become a teacher and the teachers he had. He said that in high school he had a really great English teacher one year and then a not so great one the next year. It made me think about my current (and sad) English situation. I had Mr. T last year and I loved his class. He was THE funnest and THE coolest teacher I've had and, if that were not already enough to make me love 9th grade English, I learned a lot from him and his class. This year however, we've gone through one and a half books (both under three hundred pages), I've written one serious essay (which has been the only real assignment we've done), I find the class and the teacher ridiculous, and yet I have learned. It may not be the kind (or the quality) of learning that I got in Mr. T's class last year, but they are lessons that I value all the same. These lessons have a lot to do with how to deal with things you don't like. I have also learned that a drama teacher does not make a good English teacher (ha ha). Sure, I would absolutely love to have another teacher like Mr. T, or, better yet, just to have him again, but it is beneficial for me (even though I'm not actually learning anything that goes with the curriculum) to experience different types of teacher even (some could consider it especially) ones that I don't like.
I have spent so much time on this blog that I don't necessarily know where the rest of them went. However, this is more substantial than almost anything I've written in a while. So there you go. If anyone still reads this please let me know. I haven't seen any comments in a while.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
THE SOOTHSAYER: ROUTINE JUSTICE
I am a soothsayer. It is not a difficult job. It is not even a full time job. However, it is a job that has the possibility of being quite interesting at times. I was the one who tried to warn Julius Caesar about the death that I saw in his future. Now, I feel that it is important to mention that what I do is not a science. It is not something I can control and it is almost never comes up as something specific. This is important to know because on the day that I foresaw what would happen to Julius Caesar I was not aware of the extreme consequences my failing would have.
Soothsayers are not popular people. They do not go around with packs of people following them about and they often live alone. I am a typical soothsayer. My home is a small place. There is only one room, but it is perfect and fits all of my needs. There is a desk in the corner where I write my reports on the things that I “see”, a bed against one wall, and a cooking area against the other. It was here that I saw what would turn out to be the death of Julius Caesar.
One thing that I am a stickler for is routine. I cannot stand chaos because I fear that if I let chaos into my life I will never get out of it. What I do is unpredictable and to let any other unknowns in is very risky. Anyway, that morning I got up and got my breakfast. As I was eating I sorted through the things I had been seeing lately and looked for connections. This is something that I do every couple of days. While I write everything down as I see them I do not actually try to figure out what it means until it has had time to set in my mind.
Julius Caesar had come up in one of my more recent “visions” ( I do not like to refer to them as such, but I have yet to find a word that fits them better).All I had seen was red. Red and then Caesar’s face. However, the things I see often come with thoughts that just come to me for reasons I often don’t understand. This time what I kept thinking was: “The ides of March. The ides of March”. Over and over again. This scene came to me the week before and I was still trying to figure out what it meant that morning.
It was while I was writing down something that had came to me while cooking that I made the connection between the ides of March, the color red, and Julius Caesar. I was almost positive that with his recent triumph over Pompey there would be some people concerned about how much power he had. This concerned me.
I was not a huge supporter of Caesar. I tend to stay out of public situations as much as possible because I fear that it will cloud my decisions. Here it was easy for me to say that if Julius Caesar was in danger then I would have to help him. I didn’t know whether what he was doing was good or bad and to me it didn’t matter. He was in danger and I had seen it so it was now my job to warn him.
I quickly turned to my notes on the Julius Caesar case and confirmed my suspicions with the evidence at hand. I needed a plan. First, I thought, I need to find out where Caesar is and how I can reach him. That is where my contacts come in. We soothsayers may be solitary, but we have our connections and our ways of gaining information. So that morning I left to town to see if I could discover Caesar’s location. I had to get to him. I see it as part of my “calling” to help those that I see. Why, after all, would I be given such information if I weren’t supposed to use in some way?
It did not take me long to find a man, his name was John, who could tell me what Julius Caesar was planning on doing that day. It was the day of the footrace, I was told, and Caesar wanted his wife to be touched by Mark Antony. I didn’t have much time to get there. I had to get going rather quickly. I inquired quickly about the best possible way to get close enough to Caesar for him to hear me, see me, if possible.
And with that I was off to warn Caesar to beware the ides of March.
I wrote this for my English class yesterday. The assignment was to write about what the soothsayer did before coming to Caesar in Act I Scene 2. I actually had a lot of fun doing it and I think it could make a really good short story. I don't know. I haven't really gotten into Julius Caesar but this assignment was fun. So it's all good. :P
Soothsayers are not popular people. They do not go around with packs of people following them about and they often live alone. I am a typical soothsayer. My home is a small place. There is only one room, but it is perfect and fits all of my needs. There is a desk in the corner where I write my reports on the things that I “see”, a bed against one wall, and a cooking area against the other. It was here that I saw what would turn out to be the death of Julius Caesar.
One thing that I am a stickler for is routine. I cannot stand chaos because I fear that if I let chaos into my life I will never get out of it. What I do is unpredictable and to let any other unknowns in is very risky. Anyway, that morning I got up and got my breakfast. As I was eating I sorted through the things I had been seeing lately and looked for connections. This is something that I do every couple of days. While I write everything down as I see them I do not actually try to figure out what it means until it has had time to set in my mind.
Julius Caesar had come up in one of my more recent “visions” ( I do not like to refer to them as such, but I have yet to find a word that fits them better).All I had seen was red. Red and then Caesar’s face. However, the things I see often come with thoughts that just come to me for reasons I often don’t understand. This time what I kept thinking was: “The ides of March. The ides of March”. Over and over again. This scene came to me the week before and I was still trying to figure out what it meant that morning.
It was while I was writing down something that had came to me while cooking that I made the connection between the ides of March, the color red, and Julius Caesar. I was almost positive that with his recent triumph over Pompey there would be some people concerned about how much power he had. This concerned me.
I was not a huge supporter of Caesar. I tend to stay out of public situations as much as possible because I fear that it will cloud my decisions. Here it was easy for me to say that if Julius Caesar was in danger then I would have to help him. I didn’t know whether what he was doing was good or bad and to me it didn’t matter. He was in danger and I had seen it so it was now my job to warn him.
I quickly turned to my notes on the Julius Caesar case and confirmed my suspicions with the evidence at hand. I needed a plan. First, I thought, I need to find out where Caesar is and how I can reach him. That is where my contacts come in. We soothsayers may be solitary, but we have our connections and our ways of gaining information. So that morning I left to town to see if I could discover Caesar’s location. I had to get to him. I see it as part of my “calling” to help those that I see. Why, after all, would I be given such information if I weren’t supposed to use in some way?
It did not take me long to find a man, his name was John, who could tell me what Julius Caesar was planning on doing that day. It was the day of the footrace, I was told, and Caesar wanted his wife to be touched by Mark Antony. I didn’t have much time to get there. I had to get going rather quickly. I inquired quickly about the best possible way to get close enough to Caesar for him to hear me, see me, if possible.
And with that I was off to warn Caesar to beware the ides of March.
I wrote this for my English class yesterday. The assignment was to write about what the soothsayer did before coming to Caesar in Act I Scene 2. I actually had a lot of fun doing it and I think it could make a really good short story. I don't know. I haven't really gotten into Julius Caesar but this assignment was fun. So it's all good. :P
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Censorship: Ineffective and Unnecessary (An essay for my English 10 Honors class.)
The United States of America is supposedly a free nation. However, nowhere does it officially mention how limited and censored that freedom is. Banning books, movies, music, ideas, etc. only creates curiosity in those who have been banned. Everyone believes in something different, therefore banning something because it goes against people’s beliefs is wrong. Most importantly, though, is that every person deserves the right to decide what is moral and what is not. Censoring is, in essence, taking away a person’s ability to think and choose on their own. Taking that ability away to any extent is wrong, ineffective, and unnecessary.
It has been argued that banning any kind of idea or material is right because humans are curious by nature. Those people believe that it is right to censor immoral material because if not banned people would be into it at the blink of an eye. This idea discredits the whole of the human race. Yes, if some material weren’t blocked there are people who would use it, see it, listen to it; there are also many people who use it anyway – they don’t care that it is blocked – it is still accessible. Telling people that something is bad and so it is forbidden is like saying “look, there’s a bowl of ice cream right in front of you, but you are not allowed to eat it”. There are some people that would walk away from the bowl of ice cream without a second thought, but there are others who would eat the ice cream even if they resisted for a while. Curiosity is part of human nature but so is endurance. If someone saw a bowl of ice cream and they had not been told not to eat it a good deal more would leave it alone because it wasn’t theirs or they had no interest in it. The people who will walk right by the ice cream need to be considered.
The United States of America is represented by many different religions. Freedom of religion is part of the constitution. This alone makes people think that they have every right to protect their beliefs and they do, but there comes a point where it is not only protecting one person’s beliefs but limiting or attacking another person’s. Some would say that it is not only their beliefs they are protecting but the traditions of the nation. Traditions need to change. Time passes and the world rotates and people need to adjust. Society now is much different than it was during the nineteenth century. Banning something because it is not Christian is like an atheist banning the bible. All people and all beliefs need to be recognized and when people are censoring things, banning books or movies or anything else because it goes against their beliefs, people of other beliefs are also being restricted. It takes away their choice and their right to choose.
Immanuel Kant was a European philosopher in the eighteenth century. He said that no action is right or moral if it takes away the reason of others. Basically, if someone does something the makes it so that someone else can not think or decide for themselves then that action is immoral and wrong. This concept shows that censoring things is wrong. The government creates lists of banned books, music, authors, and movies and takes away the right of people to decide for themselves whether or not that content is appropriate. This is the most important reason why censorship is bad. Every person needs to be able to think for themselves. Everyone needs to have the chance to make their own mistakes and to discover the world in their own way. To keep the bad things away from people is to shut them out from the bad things in the world. It creates false ideas in children and teens which end up hurting them in their futures.
For a free country, people of the United States of America are very restricted. Censorship in any form is wrong, ineffective, and unnecessary. While curiosity is part of human nature, restricting what a person can see, watch, listen to, and think only creates more curiosity and temptation. The idea that censoring things that go against a person’s beliefs is wrong as well. Last, but definitely not least, every person is born with the right to think for themselves and to censor things is to take that right away. People deal with censorship every day. Maybe if there wasn’t so much of it people would make better choices for themselves and learn about the world in a more truthful way.
It has been argued that banning any kind of idea or material is right because humans are curious by nature. Those people believe that it is right to censor immoral material because if not banned people would be into it at the blink of an eye. This idea discredits the whole of the human race. Yes, if some material weren’t blocked there are people who would use it, see it, listen to it; there are also many people who use it anyway – they don’t care that it is blocked – it is still accessible. Telling people that something is bad and so it is forbidden is like saying “look, there’s a bowl of ice cream right in front of you, but you are not allowed to eat it”. There are some people that would walk away from the bowl of ice cream without a second thought, but there are others who would eat the ice cream even if they resisted for a while. Curiosity is part of human nature but so is endurance. If someone saw a bowl of ice cream and they had not been told not to eat it a good deal more would leave it alone because it wasn’t theirs or they had no interest in it. The people who will walk right by the ice cream need to be considered.
The United States of America is represented by many different religions. Freedom of religion is part of the constitution. This alone makes people think that they have every right to protect their beliefs and they do, but there comes a point where it is not only protecting one person’s beliefs but limiting or attacking another person’s. Some would say that it is not only their beliefs they are protecting but the traditions of the nation. Traditions need to change. Time passes and the world rotates and people need to adjust. Society now is much different than it was during the nineteenth century. Banning something because it is not Christian is like an atheist banning the bible. All people and all beliefs need to be recognized and when people are censoring things, banning books or movies or anything else because it goes against their beliefs, people of other beliefs are also being restricted. It takes away their choice and their right to choose.
Immanuel Kant was a European philosopher in the eighteenth century. He said that no action is right or moral if it takes away the reason of others. Basically, if someone does something the makes it so that someone else can not think or decide for themselves then that action is immoral and wrong. This concept shows that censoring things is wrong. The government creates lists of banned books, music, authors, and movies and takes away the right of people to decide for themselves whether or not that content is appropriate. This is the most important reason why censorship is bad. Every person needs to be able to think for themselves. Everyone needs to have the chance to make their own mistakes and to discover the world in their own way. To keep the bad things away from people is to shut them out from the bad things in the world. It creates false ideas in children and teens which end up hurting them in their futures.
For a free country, people of the United States of America are very restricted. Censorship in any form is wrong, ineffective, and unnecessary. While curiosity is part of human nature, restricting what a person can see, watch, listen to, and think only creates more curiosity and temptation. The idea that censoring things that go against a person’s beliefs is wrong as well. Last, but definitely not least, every person is born with the right to think for themselves and to censor things is to take that right away. People deal with censorship every day. Maybe if there wasn’t so much of it people would make better choices for themselves and learn about the world in a more truthful way.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Short and Slightly Random
So, I'm not at my happiest right now. Normally in this type of mood I would just sit around and think about how annoyed I was and how dumb it all was and all of that, but today I don't want to. Today I want to think about good things, productive things. Like... What I will get done tomorrow while avoiding the computer and other distractions:
1. Fill out my brainstorm sheet for Newspaper (which will require a bit of computer usage)
2. Clean my room to prepare for Panda coming over on Friday
3. Do my laundry (bet you didn't really care to know about that... or any of this really)
4. Read Act 1 of Julius Caesar for English
Hopefully I will get all of this done tomorrow so that I will be prepared for school on Thursday and not be in trouble come Friday. That would be nice.
Anyway, it's kind of late and I should be going to bed... Or at least reading. I hope everyone is having a great year so far and a great month and week. If not... Well... "The sun will come out, tomorrow. Bet your bottom dollar that, tomorrow, there'll be sun." And there is your random but not-so-random Annie reference for the year.
"Oy with the poodles already!"
Ten brownie points to whoever gets that reference. Ha ha.
Goodnight everyone!
Sunday, January 11, 2009
New... Everything.
January 11th. More than a week into the new year. Just a week until the new term begins. I'm sitting here writing on my new laptop with a new blog editing program that allows me to write and preview my posts without being on the internet. I'm also thinking about how I want to get the pictures off of my new camera and put them online. All around me I am surrounded by new, and to tell you the truth I don't mind. The main reason for that is that I am here, in my familiar home, with my family surrounding me. New things are never so bad if you have something familiar to hang on too.
This year... It feels different. Not just different from last year. Not just different in the way all new things are different. I get the feeling that big things are going to happen this year. Not just for me. Not just for those around me. I feel that this year is going to be a big year for the world. Is that dumb? I know it's kind of like... 'Well duh'. But I just think that the feeling is worth mentioning.
Isn't it? Isn't it worth mentioning when someone feels that there is something big going on? When someone has a feeling that things are going to change in a huge way. Even if they don't know how or why or whether it will be good or bad? I know that this year is going to bring about big big changes for my family. My littlest sisters will finish the sixth grade and start junior high this year. Elmo and my step sister, Shla, who lives in Georgia, will finish junior high/middle school and move on to high school. Izzy and I will get our driver's licenses. My car will hopefully get finished and Izzy will get one as well. I'll experience my first full year with my dad living in California. My half sister and my cousin will become the first people that I personally know who have graduated in my lifetime. And these are just the ones I can tell you about.
I can't say that everyone I know will still be the way they are now by the end of the year. In fact, I can probably tell you that not a single one of them will be. For my friends and my siblings there are major life changes coming around the corner. My extended family have always been and will always be mysterious to me. I will see them no more than ten times in the next year, as I have in the past. But maybe the level of communication we have reached in the last few months will help me get to know them a little bit better.
Who knows what this year is bringing us. All I can say is that 2009 is going to be a big one and I am so ready to see what it has in store for me. I am not the same person who wrote in this blog on January 13th of last year. I will not be this person in January next year. A person is constantly changing. The way I think about something today will not be the way I think about it tomorrow. Change is constant and continual. Other than gravity, I'd say it's the most consistent force in the universe.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
End of 2008 Rambles...
2008... What was it for me? In truth, I'm not sure that I know. 2008 has been a year of so many things. I have changed so completely that I can't remember how it felt to be me a year ago. I've been through so much and yet there have been other years where I can point out so many more events. So maybe 2008 was not eventful. There were some firsts: my first boyfriend, my first "date" (although I'm not so sure if it really was a date...), my first published poem, my first break up, my first time driving, my first day of high school, etc. There have been good moments and bad moments alike.
Can my year be summed up by the blogs I have written? I don't think so. The reason for this might be that I have never wanted this to be a journal-y type thing. Can you tell that I've changed through the year's worth of writing? I'm sure you can. One thing I've realized through writing is that a writer's voice is constantly changing. A writer who starts something and then puts it down before coming back to it after a period of time will find that phrases that sounded perfectly right to them before now sound like something that was written by someone else in some other time and place. So looking back at my writing I can see that I am not the same as I was a year ago.
But who would want to go a whole year and not change at all? That would mean that through 365 days you let every experience you had just pass right by you. I know that I've written about change at least twice. The first time I believe I was talking about how I was not looking forward to the changes going on. The second time I was excited to see what these changes would bring me. Now... I'm not really for or against it. Change is just life. It's not good or bad. It is just something that happens.
How have I changed this year? Well I believe I'm a better person than I was at the beginning of last year. I had a boyfriend who showed me (through things we both said/did) that I was not a very nice person. I worked to change that but it took further evidence from my family for me to completely turn around. Now? Now I am much happier and I think every aspect of my life shows that. I've learned to be content with what I have and not to complain so much. I've learned that you don't have to be the best to be good and to be valued. I had, I have, some friends who are completely amazing academically. I spent a good part of this year being compared to them (at Fairfield mostly) by teachers and other students. It tore me apart for a while. I kept thinking about how horrible I was and how I needed to be more like them. I know that isn't true now. I know that there is more to my life than school. Whether I manage to get more 4.0 GPAs or not I will not be like my friends are. I'm not like that. I don't need to be.
There are so many things that have happened this year. So many things have changed me and I don't mind. Just the fact that I am still writing in this blog shows that I am more determined than I was a year ago. I had never thought that this would be something I would continue to do. In fact I'm sure I've mentioned several times before that I was sure that I wouldn't continue to write here anymore.
Anyway, I've just completely lost my train of thought, as usual, and so I'm going to go.
Make the last day of 2008 count everyone! It's been a good year! May 2009 be just as great!
Can my year be summed up by the blogs I have written? I don't think so. The reason for this might be that I have never wanted this to be a journal-y type thing. Can you tell that I've changed through the year's worth of writing? I'm sure you can. One thing I've realized through writing is that a writer's voice is constantly changing. A writer who starts something and then puts it down before coming back to it after a period of time will find that phrases that sounded perfectly right to them before now sound like something that was written by someone else in some other time and place. So looking back at my writing I can see that I am not the same as I was a year ago.
But who would want to go a whole year and not change at all? That would mean that through 365 days you let every experience you had just pass right by you. I know that I've written about change at least twice. The first time I believe I was talking about how I was not looking forward to the changes going on. The second time I was excited to see what these changes would bring me. Now... I'm not really for or against it. Change is just life. It's not good or bad. It is just something that happens.
How have I changed this year? Well I believe I'm a better person than I was at the beginning of last year. I had a boyfriend who showed me (through things we both said/did) that I was not a very nice person. I worked to change that but it took further evidence from my family for me to completely turn around. Now? Now I am much happier and I think every aspect of my life shows that. I've learned to be content with what I have and not to complain so much. I've learned that you don't have to be the best to be good and to be valued. I had, I have, some friends who are completely amazing academically. I spent a good part of this year being compared to them (at Fairfield mostly) by teachers and other students. It tore me apart for a while. I kept thinking about how horrible I was and how I needed to be more like them. I know that isn't true now. I know that there is more to my life than school. Whether I manage to get more 4.0 GPAs or not I will not be like my friends are. I'm not like that. I don't need to be.
There are so many things that have happened this year. So many things have changed me and I don't mind. Just the fact that I am still writing in this blog shows that I am more determined than I was a year ago. I had never thought that this would be something I would continue to do. In fact I'm sure I've mentioned several times before that I was sure that I wouldn't continue to write here anymore.
Anyway, I've just completely lost my train of thought, as usual, and so I'm going to go.
Make the last day of 2008 count everyone! It's been a good year! May 2009 be just as great!
Friday, December 12, 2008
So...
I haven't published a post in a while. That isn't to say that I haven't written any. Quite to the contrary, actually. I've written quite a few. I just need to finish them. I don't when that will happen, though.
Right now I'm sitting in Newspaper. Our first drafts of our December issue articles are due today and I have just finished mine. I have spent the last half hour researching statistics about the iPod and the Zune. I'm writing an opinion article on it. Unfortunately I got put on the Zune side and have to write about a product I've never used. So I've been trying to use more information than my actual opinion (considering I don't have one).
So yes. That's what I'm doing.
What's going on? Why have I not written in... Two weeks? Well, that's mostly because I've just been crazy busy. Tomorrow is my 16th birthday party that I'm throwing with KarKar and a bunch of friends. Then on Thursday is my birthday and then next weekend I'm going to my grandma's and my dad is coming to visit from California. Plus I've been working crazily with school (and what do I have to show for it? NOTHING!).
So yeah, I just thought I would update on why I haven't posted anything. I have more interesting things coming. I promise. As soon as I get around to writing them.
Anyway, adios mis amigos!
Right now I'm sitting in Newspaper. Our first drafts of our December issue articles are due today and I have just finished mine. I have spent the last half hour researching statistics about the iPod and the Zune. I'm writing an opinion article on it. Unfortunately I got put on the Zune side and have to write about a product I've never used. So I've been trying to use more information than my actual opinion (considering I don't have one).
So yes. That's what I'm doing.
What's going on? Why have I not written in... Two weeks? Well, that's mostly because I've just been crazy busy. Tomorrow is my 16th birthday party that I'm throwing with KarKar and a bunch of friends. Then on Thursday is my birthday and then next weekend I'm going to my grandma's and my dad is coming to visit from California. Plus I've been working crazily with school (and what do I have to show for it? NOTHING!).
So yeah, I just thought I would update on why I haven't posted anything. I have more interesting things coming. I promise. As soon as I get around to writing them.
Anyway, adios mis amigos!
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
So Here I Am
Sitting in Newspaper. We're putting the final issues on the November issue and I am pretty much done with my page. I don't really have anything to do right now because of it and so I'm thinking that I'm going to blog until I find something else to do. So...
Excitement.
Ha ha.
The next few weeks are going to be AMAZING. Completely and totally. I am just so excited. (Holy crap, I sound so retarded it is not even funny (this dumb program doesn't know how to spell 'is')). So anyway, the next... six weeks... are going to be awesome.
Why?
Because. My step sister, aka Shla, is out to visit from Georgia for the week and since this is the last day of school this week that is going to be awesome. Then, this week is also Thanksgiving and so tomorrow my family is having a dinner at home and then on Thursday we are going to my grandma's house for dinner. So that will be great.
Then...
December 6th I am going to the Nutcracker with my mom, sisters, grandma, aunt, and cousin. We've been saying we were going to go since I was little and now we are FINALLY going! I am so excited for that.
Then... (Ha ha!)
December 13th is my combined sixteenth birthday party and Christmas party for me, Carley, Nicole (whose birthday is the 18th), Hillary, and Kara (whose birthday is on the 7th). That is going to be soooo great because we've invited like fifty of our friends (even though we conveniently planned it for the same day as Davis' Christmas dance and so a whole bunch of them are coming) and it's the first party I've had since I was in elementary school.
After that...
My birthday is on the 18th and I'm going to see my dad for the first time in months that weekend because it's the family Christmas party/birthday party for me. That is going to be great even though it is going to have some bad in it too.
Then of course there is Christmas on the 25 and New Years after that.
I am sooooo excited for the next couple of weeks, but I can't believe that 2008 has passed so quickly. This time last year I was crushing over my ex and he didn't even know it. We hung out everyday and were best friends. This time last year I was stressing out over school and Science Olympiad was way fun for me. Now my ex and I talk civily sometimes after having one of the biggest fights I've ever been in with anyone and we're hardly even friends anymore. Now I am taking it easy with school because the only problem I have with my classes is that I was gone for three days two weeks ago. Now I absolutely hate Science Olympiad and wish I could just quit but I'm too afraid that my Chemistry teacher would then hate me because she's my coach and that would be bad.
So I'm thinking as the year comes to a close about the things that I want to remember. There are so many of them, and I'm sure in the next month I'm going to add a bunch more to that. 2008 has so far proven to be an amazing year, if not incredibly horrible at times. I've changed so much since I created this blog, or even since I wrote that blog at 12 o'clock on New Years Eve. How my priorties have changed, how my friends have changed, how my life has changed! It's so freaking incredible.
As I sit here in Newspaper, my excitement for the next month is growing and I'm thinking about what I want to do to remember this year. All around me are reminders of the past (I ran into one yesterday that got me thinking for hours) and ideas that will help create my future. It's weird how much things have changed (I'm getting really, really repetitive). Just as I write this blog so many different memories come into my head: a dorky guy one day at art club whom Morgan and I named Steve, a great night at the mall and the movies with my boyfriend and his brother, a day that ruined a friendship forever, and that's just the ones that have to do with the boy sitting next to me right now.
But anyway, this blog has turned into a really crappy bunch of nothing. Not like that is any different from anything else I ever write. That's one thing I said last year. I wasn't going to let this blog turn into crap. But it has. Oh well. At least I still write in it.
Anyway, Thanksgiving break starts in seven minutes and I'm gonna go now.
Excitement.
Ha ha.
The next few weeks are going to be AMAZING. Completely and totally. I am just so excited. (Holy crap, I sound so retarded it is not even funny (this dumb program doesn't know how to spell 'is')). So anyway, the next... six weeks... are going to be awesome.
Why?
Because. My step sister, aka Shla, is out to visit from Georgia for the week and since this is the last day of school this week that is going to be awesome. Then, this week is also Thanksgiving and so tomorrow my family is having a dinner at home and then on Thursday we are going to my grandma's house for dinner. So that will be great.
Then...
December 6th I am going to the Nutcracker with my mom, sisters, grandma, aunt, and cousin. We've been saying we were going to go since I was little and now we are FINALLY going! I am so excited for that.
Then... (Ha ha!)
December 13th is my combined sixteenth birthday party and Christmas party for me, Carley, Nicole (whose birthday is the 18th), Hillary, and Kara (whose birthday is on the 7th). That is going to be soooo great because we've invited like fifty of our friends (even though we conveniently planned it for the same day as Davis' Christmas dance and so a whole bunch of them are coming) and it's the first party I've had since I was in elementary school.
After that...
My birthday is on the 18th and I'm going to see my dad for the first time in months that weekend because it's the family Christmas party/birthday party for me. That is going to be great even though it is going to have some bad in it too.
Then of course there is Christmas on the 25 and New Years after that.
I am sooooo excited for the next couple of weeks, but I can't believe that 2008 has passed so quickly. This time last year I was crushing over my ex and he didn't even know it. We hung out everyday and were best friends. This time last year I was stressing out over school and Science Olympiad was way fun for me. Now my ex and I talk civily sometimes after having one of the biggest fights I've ever been in with anyone and we're hardly even friends anymore. Now I am taking it easy with school because the only problem I have with my classes is that I was gone for three days two weeks ago. Now I absolutely hate Science Olympiad and wish I could just quit but I'm too afraid that my Chemistry teacher would then hate me because she's my coach and that would be bad.
So I'm thinking as the year comes to a close about the things that I want to remember. There are so many of them, and I'm sure in the next month I'm going to add a bunch more to that. 2008 has so far proven to be an amazing year, if not incredibly horrible at times. I've changed so much since I created this blog, or even since I wrote that blog at 12 o'clock on New Years Eve. How my priorties have changed, how my friends have changed, how my life has changed! It's so freaking incredible.
As I sit here in Newspaper, my excitement for the next month is growing and I'm thinking about what I want to do to remember this year. All around me are reminders of the past (I ran into one yesterday that got me thinking for hours) and ideas that will help create my future. It's weird how much things have changed (I'm getting really, really repetitive). Just as I write this blog so many different memories come into my head: a dorky guy one day at art club whom Morgan and I named Steve, a great night at the mall and the movies with my boyfriend and his brother, a day that ruined a friendship forever, and that's just the ones that have to do with the boy sitting next to me right now.
But anyway, this blog has turned into a really crappy bunch of nothing. Not like that is any different from anything else I ever write. That's one thing I said last year. I wasn't going to let this blog turn into crap. But it has. Oh well. At least I still write in it.
Anyway, Thanksgiving break starts in seven minutes and I'm gonna go now.
Saturday, November 22, 2008
So...
It's been about a week since I've posted anything. Can I tell you how surprised I am that I am posting this often? I really never expected that I would continue with this blog even though I told myself I would. I've never continued on with anything like this on my own. I have had so many blogs over the years that have just kind of sizzled into nothing after a while.
Maybe before it was because the only person reading my blog was occasionally a sister of mine who lives in Ohio? Maybe not. Either way though, I've never been able to keep up with a blog like I have with this one.
I think that it is awesome. Because for right now this blog is mostly a representation of my last year at FFJH plus a couple months of random stuff after that. I hope to keep going long enough to make this blog a representation of my high school years, and then after that college. And who knows? Maybe I'll still be writing on this blog long after that.
Anyway, I just thought that I'd post something. I wasn't actually thinking that I'd even have that much to say. Ha ha. I'm going to go get some breakfast now.
Maybe before it was because the only person reading my blog was occasionally a sister of mine who lives in Ohio? Maybe not. Either way though, I've never been able to keep up with a blog like I have with this one.
I think that it is awesome. Because for right now this blog is mostly a representation of my last year at FFJH plus a couple months of random stuff after that. I hope to keep going long enough to make this blog a representation of my high school years, and then after that college. And who knows? Maybe I'll still be writing on this blog long after that.
Anyway, I just thought that I'd post something. I wasn't actually thinking that I'd even have that much to say. Ha ha. I'm going to go get some breakfast now.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Essay #1. Apparently 1 comes after 2 today.
Teen Violence
More than 750,000 people, age 10 to 24, were treated in emergency departments for injuries received due to violence in 2004 ("Youth Violence, Fact Sheet" CDC). The numbers grow every year as teen violence becomes more and more of a problem. There are many different reasons that teen violence is becoming such a problem in our society. One of the bigger causes for teen violence is the great lack of respect. Another is the amount of negativity in the media. Also, many teens don’t have an effective way to express their anger. These are all problems that teens deal with.
The biggest cause of teen violence is the lack of respect teens have for both themselves and others. The lack of respect for both peers and elders causes many problems including anger and violence. When a teen argues with someone they don’t respect then violence becomes a risk. Disrespect from either side of an argument is harmful. When a teen thinks that someone else is being disrespectful to them they get angry, and when they get angry fights start, and not all fights end peacefully.
What makes teens so angry? There are probably many reasons that some teens are angry. One reason though, is the media. In the newspaper and on the television news focuses around bad things that are happening, the bad things that are coming, and consequences of the bad things that have already been done. With so much negativity surrounding them, how can teens not be angry? Every day they hear of wars and murders and shootings. If the media focused more on the good things that are happening in the world all people might find more reason to be happy or content, and at least some of the anger would go away. Then the rest of it could, hopefully, be dealt with in better ways.
There are many different ways for a person to effectively express anger without resorting to violence. Most teens know that. Even the ones who do resort to violence often know that there are better ways to fix problems. The hard part of that, though, is that some teens don’t have a way to express their anger. They don’t know how to talk to someone they’re angry with. They don’t have anyone else to talk to. Violence is a compulsory action. Teens don’t usually think about the violence before they cause it. They don’t know how.
Rates of teen violence increase every year for several different reasons. They don’t respect people enough, including themselves. There’s also so much bad around them in the world that it makes them angry. Another reason is that they aren’t sure, or don’t know, how to effectively express their anger. Violence is wrong and teens know it. There are things that could be done to stop it. They know this, but they may need a little extra help to succeed.
Essay #2 Yes, I know I don't have an essay # 1. Yet.
Anger and Stress Management
All over the internet, there are self help websites and professional help websites that focus primarily on anger and stress management. Most of these websites start out by saying what anger is, how it can help, how it can hinder, and how it can be controlled. Then they move on to explain what it is that their website will do for you or what their product does that will change your life. There is nothing wrong with most of these websites. Anger and stress management is a serious skill that every person needs to have. Not only does anger and stress hurt yourself, but everyone around you. There are many ways to manage these emotions. People just have to find the things that work for them. It is not something that can just be done. It has to be worked at.
Anger is an important emotion in every person’s life. It helps motivate people toward change and it isn’t something we can just push aside (Anger Management: Using Anger Management for Stress Relief). When a person decides that they’re just going to cast that anger away, never feel it or express it at all, they often just end up hiding their emotions until, eventually, they cannot hold it in any longer. This usually just ends up causing problems for everyone else. “Stress is a biological term which refers to the consequences of the failure of a human or animal body to respond appropriately to emotional or physical threats to the organism, whether actual or imagined.” (Wikipedia: Stress (biological)). When a person feels stressed they are easily frustrated or angered. Learning to manage stress is just as important as learning to manage anger, because stress is often on of the causes of anger and frustration. Managing anger and stress may not be easy, but there are many ways to do it.
There are many, many, ways to manage anger and stress. Books are written just for the purpose, websites and groups are created to guide those who need help. Experts spend their days researching the effects of stress and anger and what can be done to make these as harmless as possible. Since managing these emotions is something every human being needs to be able to do there is no lack of information, help, or strategy. People design programs and products for people who think they need more help. Some say that stress journals are a good way to manage unwanted stress and anger. Still others think that the first thing that needs to be done is to asses where the anger is coming from. Then a person can decide what needs to be done, knowing where it is coming from. Every person deals with emotions differently, and therefore every person needs to find the method of anger and stress relief that works best for them.
Not a single person on this planet is the same as anyone else. We are all unique. So why shouldn’t our methods of dealing with emotions be too? For one person, thinking about what is causing the anger and stress might be enough for them to stop it. Another might need to have a personal journal to vent their feelings to. Each and every person is going to find that what works for them might not necessarily work for someone else. No matter what method works best, it is vitally important that people do at least know what methods work for them. When people don’t have methods of anger and stress relief they end up expressing their emotions in harmful ways that don’t help anyone. Why risk that when there are so many ways of avoiding it?
Anger and stress are emotions that every human being will feel at different times in their lives. They are basic human emotions that can be harmful to the person and others around them if they do not learn appropriate ways to manage and express them. There are many vastly different ways of controlling anger and stress; so many, in fact, that every person is going to find different methods that work for them, but not everyone else. Stress and anger management are a very, very important part of human life and should not be taken lightly.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Can't Breathe Can't Feel
Today I have done something that is going to change my life. Let's just hope I can get through it. To think that something seemingly so small is going to change my life so completely. I can't breathe. My brain feels like a mass of empty space. I deserve it. I know I deserve it.
I'm sorry.
Monday, November 10, 2008
It's Not Faith if You Use Your Eyes
Random title for today's blog. It's just a line from one of my favorite songs by Paramore. It's called Miracle!. Check it out sometime. It's a good song.
Anyway, what I really wanted to talk about tonight is a quote that I saw in Spanish today. See, my Spanish teacher is also an English teacher so she has bulletin boards with quotes about reading and writing in one corner of her room. It just so happens that she has put me in that corner for second term, so at the end of class today I was reading them. They're all really good quotes and maybe as the year goes on I'll write about more of them, but tonight I wanted to talk about the one that caught my attention today.
'A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.'
Anyway, what I really wanted to talk about tonight is a quote that I saw in Spanish today. See, my Spanish teacher is also an English teacher so she has bulletin boards with quotes about reading and writing in one corner of her room. It just so happens that she has put me in that corner for second term, so at the end of class today I was reading them. They're all really good quotes and maybe as the year goes on I'll write about more of them, but tonight I wanted to talk about the one that caught my attention today.
'A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.'
~Mark Twain 1900
I really like this quote. Mainly because I think it has a lot of truth to it. It makes me think of last year, and even just this summer. When Mr. T would assign us a book for Honors English (classics that is) people would complain. They'd complained no mater what we had to read, but classics were worse. I think that it's mostly because they are usually older books and therefore in a language that is harder to understand because it has different slang and different words. It makes it harder to read.
There are things that language doesn't change, though. I mean, even though a book is hard to read and understand it doesn't mean that said book is not a good book. Even impossibly difficult reads can have great stories to them. That is why I think that Mark Twain's quote works. I think that people really do want to know the stories as they are written, but it becomes such a hard thing to do (oh my, we really have to think?!?) that people don't actually want to read them.
I cannot really deny that this is true to me as well. Not in all circumstances, but with some classics I honestly don't want to start reading even though I absolutely love the story. It just gets to the point where I would like to read something that doesn't take as much thought. I can't read a classic when I'm tired or I've been in school all day/doing homework all night. I have to read them when I have time and patience enough to reread passages and contemplate things. I absolutely love a lot of classics though. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens and Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen are two of the ones that I read last year that have ended up being two of my favorite books ever (although even that is a very long list with like... 100 books or more).
Anyway, I just really wanted to share that quote with some of you and explain why it stuck with me today and why I like it. So that's it for tonight.
Hasta luego!
There are things that language doesn't change, though. I mean, even though a book is hard to read and understand it doesn't mean that said book is not a good book. Even impossibly difficult reads can have great stories to them. That is why I think that Mark Twain's quote works. I think that people really do want to know the stories as they are written, but it becomes such a hard thing to do (oh my, we really have to think?!?) that people don't actually want to read them.
I cannot really deny that this is true to me as well. Not in all circumstances, but with some classics I honestly don't want to start reading even though I absolutely love the story. It just gets to the point where I would like to read something that doesn't take as much thought. I can't read a classic when I'm tired or I've been in school all day/doing homework all night. I have to read them when I have time and patience enough to reread passages and contemplate things. I absolutely love a lot of classics though. Great Expectations by Charles Dickens and Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen are two of the ones that I read last year that have ended up being two of my favorite books ever (although even that is a very long list with like... 100 books or more).
Anyway, I just really wanted to share that quote with some of you and explain why it stuck with me today and why I like it. So that's it for tonight.
Hasta luego!
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Majorly Proud of Myself
Today I found a good blogger template and then kind of made it my own. I am so proud of myself for figuring it out and I think it looks way awesome.
I just thought I would share that accomplishment.
Yay.
Plus I GOT A 4.0 GPA for first term! Eeee!
Haha.
I just thought I would share that accomplishment.
Yay.
Plus I GOT A 4.0 GPA for first term! Eeee!
Haha.
Monday, November 3, 2008
National Novel Writing Month...
Started on November 1st. I am taking part in it this year and have a goal of 50,000 words to write by November 30th. That means that I have to write an average of about 1,700 words a day. So far my grand total would therefore need to be 5,100. Well I wasn't so into writing on Saturday. So I'm not that far yet... I'm actually not even to two days worth of writing that much yet. But I'm getting really close. My total right now is 3,062 words. Yay me. Haha. So before I go to sleep tonight I have just under 350 words to write. I am confident that I will do so.
Anyway the point of this blog, other than introducing NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month, nanowrimo.org) is to show you a little bit of what I have been writing. I'm proud of it. It's just a prologue so you don't really get any real plot from it, but I think it's a good way to grab attention I think. I don't think I'll be posting the whole thing here, but if you're really interested I can send you what I have at the end of the month. So here it is:
And on a side note: The October issue of the newspaper came out last week. I am very proud of it. My very favoritist twin did some art for the center page and it looks amazing. Plus I have two less than amazing articles. Woot!
Anyway the point of this blog, other than introducing NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month, nanowrimo.org) is to show you a little bit of what I have been writing. I'm proud of it. It's just a prologue so you don't really get any real plot from it, but I think it's a good way to grab attention I think. I don't think I'll be posting the whole thing here, but if you're really interested I can send you what I have at the end of the month. So here it is:
Prologue
Come on Mike! Get up! Hurry, they're right behind us!" A tall and lanky red haired woman yelled to the dark haired man who was lying on the ground ten yards away from her. They were being chased by the police. They were in trouble. Together they had done something neither of them could ever have imagined and they were going to pay the price with their lives. Now they were on the run and Mike, the clumsy guy that he was, had fallen down. She ran back over to help him. Mike was slowly getting to his feet. The woman grabbed his hand and pulled him up and forward. "Laura," Mike gasped. "They can't be that far behind us. I can't run anymore Laura. Maybe we can't get out of this." He was breathing heavily and limping as he ran. He figured he must have pulled a muscle in his right leg when he feel, the knees of his jeans were torn and the skin of his palms were scraped raw.
“We have to keep going Mike,” Laura, who was in much better shape, breathed. Her voice was not more than a whisper; it was as if she was trying to keep the brick walls on either side of the street from hearing them. “Giving up would here, now, would be giving up on our lives. I’m only nineteen Mike! I’m not ready to give up.”
Mike often thought that Laura was over dramatic, but of course an actor would be. Now though, he was sure she was speaking the truth. To stop running, to hand themselves over to the police would mean a lifetime in jail for both of them. He couldn’t deny that he did not want that for himself, but to say that he had what it took to run from the law would be the biggest lie anyone on the west coast had ever heard.
Suddenly it seemed as if there were a thousand noises around them. Police sirens and the roar of car engines were coming on their backs rapidly. Mike could also hear the voice and running steps of the police men who had begun chasing them on foot a quarter of an hour ago. ‘This is it.’ Mike thought, ‘we’re as good as dead now.’ He didn’t know why they were still running even. The cars would catch up to them any second, the men on foot not long after that, and then it would be suicide to keep going.
There was an ally just ahead of them and Laura pulled Mike’s arm as she turned into it. They flattened themselves against the wall and Mike thought that he might laugh if the situation wasn’t so serious. It was just like being in a movie. People always said not to trust movies because they were inaccurate but being chased by the cops was just like it was on the big screen, minus the helicopters.
They were both breathing heavily, their chests moving up and down faster than either could have ever imagined possible. They were safe. They had managed to find a hiding place where they could watch as the police ran right past them. Mike looked at Laura and saw the relief in her eyes. “I guess we won’t have to give up today, Laura. You were right. We did it.”
And they had… Almost. The cops were just about to go running past the ally when Mike’s watch alarm went off. Twelve o’clock midnight. It was an appropriate time, he thought, a great time to be caught. The dawn of the new day would see two criminals to jail, already the day was proving to be a safer one.
Laura’s eyes were squeezed shut as tight as they would go and tears were streaming from them. Mike was looking frantically around the ally for an escape. Laura had gotten them this far; it was his turn to make a move. Toward the end of the ally there was a door. He couldn’t be sure it went anywhere but he did know that if they got there fast enough the cops might just think that they had gone out the back, it was dark after all.
Mike shook Laura’s shoulder to get her attention. He pointed toward the door and watched as she looked from his face to wall he pointed at. She seemed to be confused for a moment before realization lit up her eyes. She nodded; all hope that they would live through the night had come back to her in a split second, making Mike feel very accomplished. He had managed to save her, or at least came up with a plan to do so.
At the same time they pushed off from the wall and sprinted toward the door. He could hear the police behind him but kept going anyway. “Come on, Mike.” Laura whispered, “We can do this!” They were only ten to fifteen yards from the door and getting closer with every second. ‘We can do this,’ Mike echoed in his head. ‘We are strong and we can do this.’
Laura reached the door slightly ahead of him and grasped the metal handle as if her life depended on it, which it did. She grabbed Mike’s hand with her free one before shoving the door open. One more second and it would be too late. They had to get out of sight now. She yanked him inside and slammed the door shut leaning against it with her eyes closed and trying to catch her breath.
Mike was sitting on the floor. He couldn’t quite tell what the room was because his head was swimming and he wasn’t really paying attention. He placed his palms flat against the ground on either side of him and found something that he had definitely not been expecting. Grass. His eyes flew to Laura at the door and found her looking around wide eyed and shocked. She was no longer against the door, but feeling it with her hands. It was wood. Not cold metal that it had been on the other side.
Mike looked to other side of himself and found that he had to squint because of the bright light. He shook his head slightly and looked around again. They were in what appeared to be a field that went on and on forever. Laura was leaning against the door of a small shack or a shed that looked more than abandoned, but not necessarily old.
“Where the hell are we?” Laura asked quietly. Mike had stood up and was coming to stand beside her.
“I have absolutely no idea.”
And on a side note: The October issue of the newspaper came out last week. I am very proud of it. My very favoritist twin did some art for the center page and it looks amazing. Plus I have two less than amazing articles. Woot!
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Who am I?
A friend of mine, who goes by the name of PasoFreak, wrote in her blog today telling her friends a little bit more about her. When I read it I felt like it was something I might want to do. But then I thought about why I don't tell people more about me. What is there that people don't know? I am a nerd. I love reading, writing, learning. I am smart. I've been doing Science Olympiad since seventh grade and I have six state level medals and two national level medals. I have six sisters. My twin sister and I look nothing alike. My absolute favorite thing to do is to hang out with my mom and my sisters. I'm good at math and I like math. I'm not LDS and I don't have a religion. That seems to be the simplest facts about me. Is there more? Yes. I believe there is. Probably even a lot more that you all know about me.
I'm sure there are things you don't know as well, but what are they?
Well, the first I guess might be that I have no idea what I believe in. I don't know what to think and I believe that the ideas of the universe are just way to big to be picked out and deciphered. I spend a lot of my time trying to figure out what I believe. I know a little bit about Christianity but I learned most of it before I was 8 when I went to an LDS church with my parents every Sunday. I know that I can't honestly see myself as ever being part of an organized religion because I feel that when you are part of something like that you should honestly believe every part of it is true and I don't know if there is a religion out there that could sum up everything that I think and feel.
Something that I've only discovered recently, and therefore not many people know about me, is that I've decided that I don't want to be a scientist. I would much rather spend my life learning about people, both past and present, reading, or writing. I would also like to use my ability to understand things easily. I don't know for sure what I'm going to end up doing with my life, but I would really really love to teach English or be a journalist. I don't know if this surprises some of you or not, but I realized last year that I cannot see myself spending my life doing the types of things I do at every Science Olympiad meeting.
Other than that, though? I don't really know. What else is there about me that other people don't know? What is there about me that people want to know? Anything?
Should there be more that I should want you to know about me? I don't know. I have no idea what I should I know about myself. Is there something wrong with that? Do I need to know exactly where I want to go to college right now? Do I need to know where I want to be right after I graduate? What else should I know about myself?
I don't know. Have any ideas?
I'm sure there are things you don't know as well, but what are they?
Well, the first I guess might be that I have no idea what I believe in. I don't know what to think and I believe that the ideas of the universe are just way to big to be picked out and deciphered. I spend a lot of my time trying to figure out what I believe. I know a little bit about Christianity but I learned most of it before I was 8 when I went to an LDS church with my parents every Sunday. I know that I can't honestly see myself as ever being part of an organized religion because I feel that when you are part of something like that you should honestly believe every part of it is true and I don't know if there is a religion out there that could sum up everything that I think and feel.
Something that I've only discovered recently, and therefore not many people know about me, is that I've decided that I don't want to be a scientist. I would much rather spend my life learning about people, both past and present, reading, or writing. I would also like to use my ability to understand things easily. I don't know for sure what I'm going to end up doing with my life, but I would really really love to teach English or be a journalist. I don't know if this surprises some of you or not, but I realized last year that I cannot see myself spending my life doing the types of things I do at every Science Olympiad meeting.
Other than that, though? I don't really know. What else is there about me that other people don't know? What is there about me that people want to know? Anything?
Should there be more that I should want you to know about me? I don't know. I have no idea what I should I know about myself. Is there something wrong with that? Do I need to know exactly where I want to go to college right now? Do I need to know where I want to be right after I graduate? What else should I know about myself?
I don't know. Have any ideas?
In the Computer Lab Again...
And I found an amazing new template! Guys, I absolutely love it! I didn't know that there were blogger templates out there that were this cool. The only problem is that the date of my posts don't show anymore. But whatever. You can always look over at the archive thing on the side.
Anyway, I just thought I would share my excitement with you all.
Eee!
My blog looks amazing. AMAZING!!!
Plus, the first issue of the school newspaper with my cover article is being distributed today!
I am sooooo happy!
Woot!
Anyway, I just thought I would share my excitement with you all.
Eee!
My blog looks amazing. AMAZING!!!
Plus, the first issue of the school newspaper with my cover article is being distributed today!
I am sooooo happy!
Woot!
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Mandala Essay
So for one of my classes I had to create a mandala and write an essay on it. I decided that I would post it here because... Well mostly because I posted almost every essay I wrote last year on here. Or at least I think I did. Anyway, here it is:
Mandala Essay
A mandala by definition is a geometric design which symbolizes the universe. While mine symbolizes something far smaller than the universe it is a design which symbolizes something. My life can be represented by six simple symbols that represent something far more complicated. The center of my mandala is a polar bear that represents family. The outside edge of the mandala is a series of linked circles that represent friendship. On the inside there are four symbols that each represent a very significant part of my life. The first is a path to represent progress. The second is a book showing my love for writing, reading, and history. The third is two mountains creating a canyon with a bird flying through it. The last symbol is a group of music notes that represent music. Each of these sixth things are very important to me in different ways.
The polar bear represents my family. For a few years now my five sisters and I have been calling my mom ‘Mama Bear’. The story of how this came to be could be an essay in itself, but the reasoning behind the nickname is that my mom takes care of us. We are a close bunch, my girls and
The interlinking circles that create the outside border of my mandala represent my friends. The circles are supposed to show that my friends and I come from all different social areas. We do many fun things together but there’s more to my friendships than just socializing. Throughout the good and the bad times of the last few years my friends have been there. Whether I needed to complain, vent, or ask for advice they were always there to talk to me and they’ll continue to be there for a long time. Sometimes there are things that I can’t tell my family, and when I come across those things I am happy to have someone else to talk to. Not only do my friends help me when I am down, they share my interests as well.
The dirt path on my mandala represents progress. Progress is an important part of my life because I think that the only way for someone to really fail at something is for them not to learn from it. School is the place where I’ve done most of my progressing in my life. I love learning and I think that progress through knowledge is one of the best possible. There is no such thing as useless knowledge. In my life I hope to progress to a place where I can be doing what I want to do and be happy doing it. To learn, though, you have to read and be literate.
On my mandala is a picture of a book with different symbols and letters on it. The first is stick figures that represent cavemen and the first writings. The second and third are symbols showing the beginning of language. The fourth are letters, the fifth sentences, and the sixth is a keyboard which leads into modern technology. This book represents my love for reading, writing, and history. Learning is a big part of my life and I love to learn about history. What better way to live a good life than studying the mistakes of others and learning from them. I love to think about how people lived before technology. Back when people had to live in nature.
The second to last symbol on my mandala is a canyon with a bird. This symbol is supposed to represent my love for nature. I don’t think I could live without plumbing and hot water, but I love to sit out in a peaceful place outdoors and think or read. The best moments I’ve ever spent alone were in Flaming Gorge away from camp on a rock ledge. I listened to the birds and the river and everything around me. The most peaceful places on earth are in nature and I think that by listening to the ‘music’ of nature you can learn more about the world around you.
The last symbol on my mandala is a group of music notes. I often find myself remembering sections of my life by the music I listened to during that time period. I also play both the guitar and the viola, albeit badly. I started playing the viola in sixth grade knowing nothing about orchestra other than that my older, half sister played the violin. I’ve wanted a guitar since before I can remember and I got one for my fifteenth birthday. Music inspires me and helps me get through all periods of my life. I have certain music that I listen to when I’m sad, different music when I’m happy, and so on. Music is as much a part of my life as friends and family are.
There are so many things I could use to represent my life, but the six I used on my mandala are some of the most important. My family is represented by the polar bear. My friends are represented by the circles. On the inside of my mandala used the path, the book, the canyon, and the music notes to symbolize my love for progress, reading and writing, nature and music. So although my mandala does not symbolize something so colossal as the universe, I think it’s pretty big and important.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Lacking Inspiration
So, I'm taking this class called AVID. I'm not sure if I mentioned it before but it's a class that I will take all through high school that will basically help me get better grades and get ready for college. It's a great class and already it's helping me. I've only missed one assignment so far this year and the circumstances behind that weren't so great. But anyway, AVID is a class where smart students get the skills they need to be successful. One of those skills is writing.
Last week we were given an assignment to create a mandala about ourselves (what things are most important to us) and then write an essay to explain the symbols we used to represent us. Today we are in the computer lab for class to work on these essays. It's only the second time I've written an essay since the end of ninth grade and I'm finding that I'm having problems getting started. It sucks, because by then end of the year in ninth grade I was able to write a decent essay in under twenty minutes. I was able to get a topic, brainstorm, and start writing so easily that it hardly took any thought at all. It was almost like blogging. Sit down in front of a computer or a notebook with a pencil and just let the words spill out.
The thing that frustrates me the most is that this isn't a hard topic at all. Maybe I'm just having a bad day, maybe I spent all of my creativity on my cover article for the Centurion (Layton High's school newspaper) last week, but whatever it is I just can't seem to be able to think about how to creatively, and interestingly write this essay. The first thing I tried was starting it with a question 'How do you choose what symbols represent your life? How can you pick the five most important things that represent you?' but after I wrote that down it did not sound right. I could not figure out how to lead in to the symbols I have chosen for my mandala to represent my life.
So I don't know. How do I come up with the inspiration for this first real essay of my sophomore year? How do I decide what is neccessary to put into this essay? How do I explain to my teacher, my classmates, etc. that my life is amazing because of the five or six symbols I've chosen? Right now I'm not sure, but I'm thinking and when I know I'll put it up here, and when I'm done with my essay I will make sure that I post it as an entry on this blog for anyone who wants to read it.
Last week we were given an assignment to create a mandala about ourselves (what things are most important to us) and then write an essay to explain the symbols we used to represent us. Today we are in the computer lab for class to work on these essays. It's only the second time I've written an essay since the end of ninth grade and I'm finding that I'm having problems getting started. It sucks, because by then end of the year in ninth grade I was able to write a decent essay in under twenty minutes. I was able to get a topic, brainstorm, and start writing so easily that it hardly took any thought at all. It was almost like blogging. Sit down in front of a computer or a notebook with a pencil and just let the words spill out.
The thing that frustrates me the most is that this isn't a hard topic at all. Maybe I'm just having a bad day, maybe I spent all of my creativity on my cover article for the Centurion (Layton High's school newspaper) last week, but whatever it is I just can't seem to be able to think about how to creatively, and interestingly write this essay. The first thing I tried was starting it with a question 'How do you choose what symbols represent your life? How can you pick the five most important things that represent you?' but after I wrote that down it did not sound right. I could not figure out how to lead in to the symbols I have chosen for my mandala to represent my life.
So I don't know. How do I come up with the inspiration for this first real essay of my sophomore year? How do I decide what is neccessary to put into this essay? How do I explain to my teacher, my classmates, etc. that my life is amazing because of the five or six symbols I've chosen? Right now I'm not sure, but I'm thinking and when I know I'll put it up here, and when I'm done with my essay I will make sure that I post it as an entry on this blog for anyone who wants to read it.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
The Beginning of Something Great
So I've survived a week and a half of high school! Yay! And I'm actually finding that I absolutely love it. Main reason being that I don't have to do all of my homework in one night. With the workload I have, that would absolutely freaking kill me. Haha. I like all but two of my teachers. My English teacher is extremely boring and the class is even worse (But who can compare after having Mr. T last year?) and then I really don't like my Health teacher. It might just be the subject, but I absolutely dread that class every other day. :(
There are so many things to love about high school. The thing that I look forward to every day, though, is lunch. I think that it is so awesome that we have only one lunch and that we have a whole hour to hang out with friends. It's awesome.
I miss Fairfield though. I had planned on going to visit Friday because we have late-start but I don't think I'll have a way to get over there. I went after school last week but the one teacher I had gone to see, Mr. T, was not there by the time I managed to get from Layton to Fairfield on foot. So I am definitely going to have to find another time I can get down there when I know that I'll be able to see him. I got to talk to some other teachers though and that was cool. I saw some of my younger friends that I won't be going to school with anymore because they'll be going to Davis in a year or so. It was great. The whole thing reminded me of when I'd stay after school last year and I'd be waiting outside for a ride almost everyday. Mr. T said that I was going to have withdrawls from the school. I kinda think I am (On a very small scale). Haha. :P
Anyway, I don't think this blog has really said anything, and I have a huge amount of reading to do for AP European History tonight so I better leave this off here. :P
There are so many things to love about high school. The thing that I look forward to every day, though, is lunch. I think that it is so awesome that we have only one lunch and that we have a whole hour to hang out with friends. It's awesome.
I miss Fairfield though. I had planned on going to visit Friday because we have late-start but I don't think I'll have a way to get over there. I went after school last week but the one teacher I had gone to see, Mr. T, was not there by the time I managed to get from Layton to Fairfield on foot. So I am definitely going to have to find another time I can get down there when I know that I'll be able to see him. I got to talk to some other teachers though and that was cool. I saw some of my younger friends that I won't be going to school with anymore because they'll be going to Davis in a year or so. It was great. The whole thing reminded me of when I'd stay after school last year and I'd be waiting outside for a ride almost everyday. Mr. T said that I was going to have withdrawls from the school. I kinda think I am (On a very small scale). Haha. :P
Anyway, I don't think this blog has really said anything, and I have a huge amount of reading to do for AP European History tonight so I better leave this off here. :P
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